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Monday, October 06, 2003

Politics, Schmolitics

You know, when you emerge from a cocoon of overwork, it seems fairly ridiculous to get exercised over politics. I start to think that "Where's the outrage?" is a question demanded by people that don't have enough to do. Don't take it personally, just make your mark and move on to things that you will care about on your death bed. Here's a good test: think about how long you're going to be dead. Really think about it. Do the math. Now, do you really need to watch another pundit show?

So much of it is a tempest in a teacup anyway. For instance, this crap about Schwartzenegger saying that he admired Hitler. It was the thinnest of stories when it broke, it depended entirely on transcripts of interviews that were acknowledged to be suspect (if you think his accent is bad now, imagine it in the mid-70s), and now it appears that he said that he didn't admire what Hitler did with his power to impress people. It's still an unseemly quote, but it's nowhere near as damaging as the accurate quote in which he claimed to be motivated to enter politics by a presidential debate that never occurred. But that didn't get the same play in the media. (Same thing with Rush Limbaugh -- the allegations of painkillers are just allegations. Where's the proof? Until I see some proof, I refuse to let my schadenfreude get the better of me.) None if it is important. Not one bit.

And even though no man of integrity could ever say that the Kay report somehow justifies the invasion of Iraq, and even though the White House said it in the knowledge that people don't tend to read past the headlines -- as demonstrated in this terrifying poll -- I'm not going to lose sleep over it. It simply doesn't bother me that this goofball is our Commander-in-Chief. And I won't cackle with glee that the Republicans can't even agree on redistricting now that they have a quorum.

And do you know why? Because in its own way, it's just as stupid and unhealthy as obsessing over J. Lo and Ben. I will stay conversationally literate on current events, I will vote, and I will not let those political bastards steal my joy. When I'm on my death bed, surrounded by my family, will I be glad that I spent time stewing in my anger over the venalities of the Bush administration? No! There's so much more that is important; so much more that expands the mind while shrinking the waistline. For instance:

TEN THINGS THAT ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHISTLE-ASS'S LATEST BULLSH*T
And this is just ten things picked at random, not the Top Ten, which I'm pretty sure was copyrighted by Letterman anyway.

1. My son can stand up without holding onto anything. It's only for about five seconds, but I foresee Olympic greatness in his future. And his cough is getting better.

2. My wife is more gorgeouser than anybody else's wife.

3. Keeping in better touch with friends and family, because it's really pathetic when your major form of communication with them is via "blog."

4. Rebuilding my running stamina. It's a little late to try to make the Olympics, but I want to be healthy enough to meet my great-grandchildren. Who will be Olympic athlete Supreme Court justices.

5. Trying to write something useful, insightful, original and lengthy about the law. By March. Which will be so enduring that my great-grandchildren will cite it in their opinions.

6. The never-ending path of home improvements that ensures that they know me by name at Lowe's. Today it's the windows, tomorrow the world!

7. The new season of "Alias," which much to my surprise is back on track after a fairly uninteresting end to last season. Where was Sidney? Why did she kill Sark's dad? And is Spy Daddy that terminally stupid, or is Spy Mommy that terminally irresistable?

8. Listening to good music, and trying to come up with a pithy description of The Beginning Stages Of..., the debut album of The Polyphonic Spree. (Best try so far: "Imagine if Pink Floyd tried to stage a performance of Hair.")

9. Two words: "Kill Bill"

10. Faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.


 5:16 PM

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