Wednesday, March 03, 2004

Constitutional Marriage Amendment

I think that Protestants for the Common Good has done a good job of drafting a constitutional amendment that will establish, once and for all, that marriage is sacred and must not be rewritten by activist courts. With God's help, we will get this passed and protect our families against indecency. Remember, this is not idle speculation. According to Gary Bauer, a major study by Oxford University has proven that homosexuality is three times more deadly than smoking. "This is not opinion, this is documented medical fact." Mr. Bauer didn't provide any information about the "major study," but I'm sure he's right. He wears a sweater and is frequently photographed with his wife and children.

So, here's the draft. Write your congressman and let him know that you want his support for this amendment.

A. Marriage in the United States shall consist of a union between
one man and one or more women. (Gen 29:17-28; II Sam 3:2-5)

B. Marriage shall not impede a man's right to take concubines in
addition to his wife or wives. (II Sam 5:13; I Kings 11:3; II Chron

C. A marriage shall be considered valid only if the wife is a
virgin. If the wife is not a virgin, she shall be executed. (Deut

D. Marriage of a believer and a non-believer shall be
forbidden. (Gen 24:3; Num 25:1-9; Ezra 9:12; Neh 10:30)

E. Since marriage is for life, neither this Constitution nor the
constitution of any State, nor any state or federal law, shall be
construed to permit divorce. (Deut 22:19; Mark 10:9)

F. If a married man dies without children, his brother shall marry
the widow. If he refuses to marry his brother's widow or
deliberately does not give her children, he shall pay a fine of one
shoe and be otherwise punished in a manner to be determined by law.
(Gen. 38:6-10; Deut 25:5-10)

G. In lieu of marriage, if there are no acceptable men in your
town, it is required that you get your dad drunk and have sex with
him (even if he had previously offered you up as a sex toy to men
young and old), tag-teaming with any sisters you may have. Of
course, this rule applies only if you are female. (Gen 19:31-36)

 8:48 AM

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