Tuesday, October 19, 2004

I'm so busy right now I can't even see straight, but I just had one of those moments of erzatz insight that make it hard to concentrate.

Right now, Houston is disgustingly hot and humid. 92 degrees, and 250% humidity. Yes, that's right -- we live in Atlantis. You can't walk to your car without mold growing on your body. It's absolutely oppressive and awful and enough to make you doubt your life choices. "What sort of sane person would end up in a city built in a swamp?," you ask yourself ten times a day.

The answer is that the people that live here came here for money -- jobs, high-paying legal work, the oil industry. The refineries east of town are said to pump out "the smell of money," but to me it smells like ass. Ass, that is, after eating a big old toxic waste burrito. That's Houston, that toddlin' town.

Yet the people that live here for their financial interest make a big deal out of supporting the city. Sort of like being a fan of the local sports team -- not because you know them personally or anything, but because only a Commie would oppose the local sports team. Similarly, Houston's wealthy boosters are stuck here, so they figure they might as well deny that there's anything wrong with the city. Such as -- to briefly reiterate -- the fact that it is nothing more than a paved swamp unfit for human habitation. The boosters see the problem as one of "perception"; that people that mention the weather and the crime and the "smell of money" are just not being good citizens. Don't they realize that the only way to tolerate the humidity is to talk about how great it is to have good ethnic food -- if you drive 45 minutes away to the place where ethnic people live? Or the arts! We have great arts! Sponsored by the local oil companies!

So, naturally I have analogized this situation to the current political climate.

Bush is the oppressive, nasty humidity that makes everyone sweat.
And the Chamber of Commerce is the Bush re-election machine. Some of the Republicans support Bush because he's their "team." Others support him only because they're stuck here, in a town that smells like toxic-waste-ass-burrito, but they can't move anywhere else. Like, say, Massachusetts.

To all those who are "stuck" in "Houston," I say this: Help is on the way, but only if you want it.
And to those of us who are actually stuck in Houston, I say this: isn't it great to live in a town with a world-class symphony?

 3:50 PM

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